A Neurotic Episode

Posted: May 14, 2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

Shit. How many years thinking up this story, a year and a half writing it, and every step of the way, up to and including the final page, and I’m all kinds of stoked on it. Tense, dark, disturbing, freaky, maybe even terrifying at parts, and I’m just loving it.

Until yesterday, when I turned it over to my editor. And suddenly a lifetime of self-doubt, long-suppressed, has come gushing up like a secret volcano. Maybe the real horror is the process of writing the story.

‘Secret volcano?’ This is worse than I thought. If I’m already relegating myself to using phrases like ‘secret volcano,’ it may be time to start drinking. Except that I hardly ever drink, so I’m not sure it would help. It probably wouldn’t. Never mind.

To be fair, I haven’t heard from her yet, which only means that she’s reading it and making notes. Which is fine; this is the process, and I entered into it willingly. And I have absolute faith in her abilities and complete trust in her opinion. I have some ideas to work into the story, so it maybe isn’t done just yet.

Okay, coming down. First anxiety attack subsiding. Till the next one.

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